Sunday, December 16, 2007


The Memory

Have you ever experienced an event in your life that you can’t seem to forget? It agitates you and angers you when you recall and dwell on the memory. Perhaps someone did one or more of the following to you?

stole from you
misled you
cheated you in some way
abused you
lied to you

And you want to get back at them—period! You cannot seem to forget the event. The anger and hate is rising and rising within you. Ask yourself the following:

Is it your mind that won’t let you forget the event?
Do you really want to forget the event?
Or do you enjoy your thoughts of anger, hate, and thoughts of revenge regarding the event?

The Choice of Revenge or Forgiveness

Fear, anger, hate, and revenge are the most destructive forms of energy that a person can become embroiled in. These negative emotions can dominate your thinking and can lead you to commit negative acts. Revenge is a very dangerous act to commit. If you commit an unjustifiable negative act in your life, you in turn will become part of that negative cycle. What goes around comes around, no matter who you are in this world. We see this time and time again in the media. By giving in to your fear, anger, and hate you ultimately will be no different than those who wronged you in the first place.

By allowing yourself to forgive the person and the event, you may find yourself in a more comfortable and content state of mind. By letting go of the need for revenge which is fed from your hate and anger, you will naturally start focusing on the things in life that truly matter to you and which hopefully bring you a sense of fulfillment. When a person is pursuing the fulfillment of their own life, generally speaking they will be content and comfortable with life: no matter how physically hectic it can be!

You have a choice of thoughts regarding revenge or forgiveness:

negative or positive
destructive or non-destructive
irrational or logical
revenge or forgiveness

You make this choice; no one else does it for you. There may be times in your life when you have to defend yourself, family, or even your country; nonetheless, the decisions during the life path are yours. It can be positively radiant and fulfilling, or it can become depressingly negative and hateful. The choice is yours.

How to Forgive

Some people struggle with the concept of releasing anger toward someone who has wronged them. The problem is that we can become so entrenched in a viewpoint we simply don’t know any different.

Here are ten ways to help you move towards contentment and forgiveness in your life and move away from toxic emotions. Go to a quite place preferably in your home, then relax for a 5-10 minutes and go through the following steps in your mind.

Calm your emotions through deep breathing.
Analyze the event from a logical objective perspective
Seek the truth and the facts
Acknowledge the facts of what happened
Know that your were mistreated
Know that you were right
Let the memory fade into history
Let go of the anger and hateful energy that surrounds you
Focus your thoughts on those who care about you in life
Focus your thoughts on the things in life that you like in life

By performing these simple steps on a daily basis, you should gradually notice that you feel more content and at peace with yourself. By focusing on those who love you and the things in life that you like, you will attract positive energy into your life . . . and that’s a good thing.


~Deb said...

Wow, that was an incredible post! Thank you for reminding me that I too, need to add forgiveness in my life. Sometimes I feel bitter when I'm betrayed and I'll say, "I forgive you, sure..., but the truth is, I sometimes end up never forgetting it.

Doesn't forgiveness go hand-in-hand with forgetting the entire event altogether?

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